When I was a kid we thought the end of the world was coming any minute via The Button Instead it came a little later

When an American marries into a brood of Scots it’s a matter of when and not if we overdo it with the family tarta…

God is the world’s only super-bower

That moment when you reclassify yourself from a mystery to an unsolved mystery

The unconscious is to repression as The algorithms are to redaction

The smartest gal in the room Is the one who realizes All the adults in the room Are emotional children Behaving like holy terrors

The decisive moment at the gates o… is exactly like the denouement in Who Wants to Be a Millionaire? but with one twist To make you feel the pressure

At bottom God is a brute fact and Satan a brutal fact

There is no mind There is no body There is thinking and there is fee… And I know all too well How you feel

Ever since I got my first smartphone it feels like I’m visiting a museum and all the decent human beings

Everybody talks about the lack of movies for grown-ups but no one mentions the absence of grown-ups Of course, without grown-ups

I thought the Protestant work eth… I saw all the lazy rivers in peopl… until I noticed they were each swi… against the current

The universe is a kinetic watch so time only keeps going if we’re on the move making Zeno’s paradox of motion just a way of reassuring ourselves

It’s not that I’ve often taken leave of my senses but that I can never take a hint

People are the opposite of baked potatoes– If you keep poking holes in their theories they will explode