If there is one thing we can all agree on it’s moral certainty

If it ain’t broke Don’t fix it So, in case of emergency Break heart To break free

Before the culture war you could talk to someone anyone say what you think and, when necessary, append a

Everyone has a gift in life and mine is knowing exactly how much I can bid in a silent auction without winning

The truth is always at a disadvant… because while you can harness truth in service of a lie you can’t tell lies

Humble pie is A required taste Until it becomes An acquired taste

A wedding ring is a mood ring that never changes color reminding us that a husband should always feel

It turns out that the afterlife is only as long as you can keep the exit interview go…

I don’t give a darn about my bland reputation

The state of nature, where there’s Something for everyone To fear Monotheism, where there’s Something for everyone

I used to think the way it works i… if it’s true then you believe it Later, I thought if you believe it

In a twist in hell there are no consequences

I grew up listening to Barbara St… You don’t bring me flowers anymore and determined I’d never make that… Ten years into marriage my wife sa… Don’t bring me flowers anymore

Ours was the first all you can eat… to earn a coveted Michelin star and I always thought it was becaus… when you ordered the whole enchila… it came with bottomless fries

Before I met you the happiest I’d ever been was when everything I’d ever wante… was on lay-away because I didn’t have to make any…