You can’t watch sports these days… Father Time is undefeated Which is when I always quote Saul… “Vait a minute. Vat about Rocky…

I can’t just let go of my past I have to lose a tug of war and get third degree rope burns

All of our choices Come down to this: We can fear God Or we can fear death

She may have lost the 2016 electio… but Hillary Clinton can claim a moral tie

The rug saves its harshest critique for the carpet

Naturally, we all want the very be… Only to discover That there is a lot of work involv… For something which in this world You can never have

When people give you the silent treatment have them put it in writing

A civilization can die From a variety of causes– Famine, conquest, madness, etc. In succumbing to boredom Ours will be the first

Materialism’s biggest assumption Is that death has the last word Which is why In their fear of death Materialists never let anyone else…

The less you need to control the more powerful you

The smartest gal in the room Is the one who realizes All the adults in the room Are emotional children Behaving like holy terrors

The original version’s working title was The Giveth and Taketh Away Tree but Silverstein couldn’t get it published

Which came first The morals Or the justification Hint: The #1 excuse

Thinking of happiness as the meaning of life is like thinking of sugar as the meaning of food

Why bother keeping score when death assures that things always end in a tie Soon you’ll be able to get rid of death