In becoming a celebrity a person meets the same kind of de… that a tree does in becoming a Christmas tree– embalmed in sugar

A man wants the mother of his children to be a chef in the kitchen “imaginative” in the bedroom a shrink in the living room

“You want fries with that?” used to be a line to mock the working poor How ironic that “You want fries with that?”

Is it really leading by example when I floss in the office men’s r… after lunch or is this what the Buddhist’s cal… bodhisattva exhibitionism

Starting gun to my head I’ll finish what you started And run the race By running in place

I want to believe in God I believe in UFOs I don’t believe in recycling I don’t want to believe in what th…

Inevitably my spirit vegetable was rutabaga

Everybody talks about the lack of movies for grown-ups but no one mentions the absence of grown-ups Of course, without grown-ups

Human beings have always used the symbolic to navigate the real; until recently we did so by imagining that the symbolic is rea… whereas scientists imagine that

My boss said It’s my way or the highway so, I took the highway to hell But when God said It’s your way or the doorway

The scientific method has, at long last arrived at a unifying theory which, for it is a dead end

I’ll give you the forest And I’ll take the trees You save the whales And I’ll keep the bees The sand in your eyes

In my third marriage I went all in on being present in the moment When she left she said that being with me

I always thought it didn’t matter if human beings really had free will as long as they experienced the wo… as if they did;

Marriage is the only place I’m neither feature nor bug but both