For someone
The winter inside of me has begun
The snowflakes that now sparkle inside my soul
Has frostbitten your picture
So I can feel....nothing.
You slide past me, all ivory and gleam
I couldn’t manage a thought or feeling
Just a numbness that spreads over everything
Keeping everything intact
A light bearing during these melancholy hours
Where what I need is to know you are on a desert
Days away from any place that I abound in
I don’t feel the sadness anymore
Just anger that creeps on me like a whore
I had things to show you, places to go
Things you saw, that excited you
But that is not a possibility anymore
Those things and places
Are not yours to hold anymore
All you’ll get is a play
Im so glad I got to see you one more time
So I could murder those feelings right in front of you
Not so you’ll know that I’m over it
But so you’ll know that this can never be
In any sense
No matter how much you hope
I will not be there for your celebrations or sadnesses
As you said we barely know each other
So it should be easier for us
You said you need time
Well a lifetime should plenty for you
You showed me many things
And the best is that you ruined humans for me
And my friend, Tina is the only one who maintained
Some semblance of that
But you are not in that
This might upset you
But I don’t need someone like you
Someone capable of making me feel
As the world is crashing down on me
By their mere presence
I will be civil
I will smile
But that is all
You get no more
What I store in my heart
My fancy, my wonderful soul
You will not get that
You’ve utterly torn it to tatters
And I am working double shifts
To mend it
And I would be happy to never have you in my shadow again.
Obviously I wish to much
Because you not only haunt my dreams
But the streets I walk
So I am done with this, with you
So take all the time you need
Everyday Im killing, every etch you in my soul
And soon I will not recognize you
So I sleep in utter peace
Coddling myself
Because I am the only one who won’t hurt me
You’ve shown me that.
