PERFORMING
I feel strange
Almost alone
An out of body experience
That’s not even my own
It’s hard to explain
The thoughts in my head
It’s different from sadness
It’s different from dread
My heart pounding in my chest
Like it’s trying to escape
Sucking in air
From the deep breaths that I take
Clenching my fingers
Until my knuckles turn white
I just want to disappear
Be hidden from site
Nothing bad has happened
I didn’t do anything wrong
A broken record
A loop of the same song
What do you call it
Paranoid or crazy
A mind that has wondered
Now thoughts become hazy
But I’ll smile and nod
May even say hello
And I’ll keep on acting
Like a performer in a show.
K.M.
