I Judge Myself
Self Abuse
I can never accept myself
Constantly self critical as well
I’m never satisfied always overwhelmed
Always putting myself mentally through hell
Sometimes I cant look in the mirror
Cause I’m disgusted at the person who stands clear
Before my eyes I realize
I’ve broken myself down
Living in despise to agonize
My mental state
Living to hate
Everything about my body
Embarrassment constantly haunts me
Follows me where ever I go
Questioning when did I let myself fall this low
I’m insecure and jealous
Envying those who are careless
Cause I want to be them, mentally
Cause I hate living in my life constantly questioning
Is this really me or am I so much more
I want to live fearless, hear me roar
Hear me scream
I want to live the life I’m suppose to be
But I’m locked up terrified, Socially
Anxiety ties me up in chains
I stare in the distance comparing myself wishing I can change
Be satisfied, and not tear myself with my eyes
I want to be skinny, I want to be pretty
Maybe if I don’t eat this I’ll get mini
Or if I do, maybe won’t so much chew
It’ll be easier coming up so it don’t travel through
My body, it’s always about my body
I just wish I can be perfect
That so much I would want me
Always criticizing yourselves so much you hate everything about 'YOU' that you don't even know who you is anymore. It's a fight I live with everyday, never happy with my self image. I have everything I need to be happy but it's just myself that I'm never happy with.
