Song of the Open Road I think that I shall never see A billboard as lovely as a tree. Perhaps unless the billboards fall… I’ll never see a tree at all.

The song of canaries Never varies, And when they’re moulting They’re pretty revolting.

There was a young belle of Natche… Whose garments were always in patc… When comment arose On the state of her clothes, She drawled, When Ah itchez, Ah…

I sit in the dusk. I am all alone… Enter a child and an ice-cream con… A parent is easily beguiled By sight of this coniferous child. The friendly embers warmer gleam,

The summer like a rajah dies, And every widowed tree Kindles for Congregationalist eye… An alien suttee.

This is a song to celebrate banks, Because they are full of money and… you hear is clinks and clanks, Or maybe a sound like the wind in… Which is the rustling of the thous…

Celery, raw Develops the jaw, But celery, stewed, Is more quietly chewed.

A child need not be very clever To learn that “Later, dear” means…

The cow is of bovine ilk; One end is moo, the other is milk.

I objurgate the centipede, A bug we do not really need. At sleepy-time he beats a path Straight to the bedroom or the bat… You always wallop where he’s not,

Foreigners are people somewhere el… Natives are people at home; If the place you’re at Is your habitat, You’re a foreigner, say in Rome.

The Lord in His wisdom made the f… And then forgot to tell us why.