It was when Socrates ate the frui… that he added this second line of… I know that my wife knows everythi…

Can’t buy me love but you can buy me likes

When God made man in His image He made a choice To give us a choice God always has a choice And He always chooses the good

I always wondered if mimes were a type of clown until having my mind blown by the insight that

I survived my humiliation By treating it like a joke Through becoming a joke myself In order to in turn survive my bec… I became a running joke

You can only make a difference in the face of indifference

I know what I want But do I want everyone else To know what I want That is the question

What would my life be like If I stopped worrying And trusted God completely? Instead of preparing for the worst And hoping for the best

In my experience If a tree falls in the forest And there is no one to hear it We all hear about it

It’s come to my attention that My attention span is limited By what I want to see And like most people these days I don’t know what I want

A materialist uses Occam’s Razor And arrives at the conclusion That the simplest explanation Is that there is no explanation A believer uses Occam’s Razor

I was waiting for my ship to come… But maybe I should have made like… And built a ship Especially since my neuroses all c… You’ve probably heard of them–

It was an offer I thought I couldn’t refuse: You can sit there and take it Or leave it Having nowhere to go

In the new version of Heads I win, tails you lose People hate to be wrong But love to apologize And if you accept their apology