What I lack in subtlety I make up for in volume

You can’t watch sports these days… Father Time is undefeated Which is when I always quote Saul… “Vait a minute. Vat about Rocky…

All cars have always been getaway cars because they tell the world how much you’re getting away with but now all cars are SUVs

We used to say Hold the phone Metaphorically Because we were about to say somet… Or because we needed to stop and t…

As the public version of one’s pri… social media is the recurring drea… of showing up at work without any… come true

I’ll go those who want to live on forever in their apartment… one better– I’ll never even leave

No one seems to see (least of all me) that being all you can be isn’t about clutching superiority– it’s for abjuring mediocrity

The only ones Who antisemites hate more than Je… Are Jews who defend themselves There is a name For their belief system:

Life isn’t fair But we are all equals In the struggle To stay out of judging others For failing at their struggles–

If you instill children with self-esteem before they’ve fought and won confidence you’ll make of them cowards

You know you must die and yet you must live You can never know if you’re right and yet you must choose So it’s not

In granting us free will God took the greatest of risks God also made us in His image God risked it all on us Risking it all on Him

Dreams don’t come true; They are true

If it’s not anticlimactic it wasn’t worth all the effort

People understand that their socia… depends on their phone but they wrongly believe that the existential question at h… is the familiar