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Chris Gaither

Chris Gaither

Make That Turkey Bacon

If Star Wars is actually told
From R2-D2’s perspective
Then our only hope
Is that God lets us go on believing
We are more powerful
Than we could possibly imagine
While God gets on with
Saving our bacon
Again and again

Autres oeuvres par Chris Gaither...
If You Take People at Their Word It Becomes Much Harder for Them to Take Your Life, but It Also Makes Your Life Much Harder

If people tell you what they plan to do and you don’t believe them it’s because pretending they don’t really mean it
Get This

I may not be the man who has everything but I’m the man who knows what to get for the man who has everything
I Want To Be What You Lack

There is only one product but infinite ways to package it
Unsolved Mysteries

We don’t understand our childhoods so we spend our adult lives reenacting them in the hope that an outside observer
“Keep on and rockin’ the sure shot”

My wife wears her heart on her sle… Yet remains a total mystery– How can she be so sure? I’m sure I don’t know But sure enough
The Ayes Are the Window to the Sole Acceptable

Everything dear to you? You can take all of that and throw it out the Overton window
Make Love, Not War

Breathe in not out
The Devil Is Just a Bad Man, Where God Is Just

The devil is a man for all occasio… Because we always have a choice To rise to the bait But God created man By giving him a choice
With the Fear of God, There’s No Such Thing as Luck

I’m afraid, I’m afraid not I’m afraid, I’m afraid not I’m afraid, I’m afraid not I’m afraid, I’m afraid not I’m afraid
The View From Nowhere

I used to stand on the moral high ground to look myself in the eye but now that I’ve plucked it out and thrown it away
Have You Ever Noticed That When People Look at Their Phones, It’s Always with a Vacant Stare?

Big Brother used to just Cross his fingers To avoid telling the truth Then uncrossed them into a V for Vacancy
I’ll Tell You a Secret– Father Knows Best Really Means Decide for Yourself; Decide for Yourself If You Believe Me

The smartest gal in the room Is the one who realizes All the adults in the room Are emotional children Behaving like holy terrors
How Do I Love Me? (Sonnet #1)

How do I love me? Let me count t… I love me to the depths of my stom… and when in line in front of a lum… I’ll take the last fried rice in t… I love me to the level of Wall St…
Drawn but Not Misbegotten

When they drew a winner It looked like we’d won By the luck of the draw But we came by our good fortune The honest way:
Being Outmanned Is Nothing Compared to Being Outclassed

When the ruffian challenges the professional by querying Am I here to amuse you? the professional displays his domi…



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