You can’t prove that God exists But even if you could People would just say Correlation does not imply causati…
To paraphrase Hitchcock a marriage is only as good as its villain
God will accept everything about you but the one thing He won’t take is the blame
At judgment day they put the brief in debriefing by getting right to the point: You could have made a difference– Did you?
Never trust anyone who doesn’t believe in hell They’re almost always the ones whose idea of heaven is usurping God
When I run out of things to do I write an itinerary: When all else fails fill sandbags to convert
If you count the rings on a tree stump it will tell you the cost of doing business
When we poll people about what the weather in heaven is like the most popular answer perhaps not surprisingly is like a cold day in hell
People think that the spork didn’t include any aspects of the… because the serrated edge of the prospective all-in-one utensil kept slicing open the focus group…
I’ll go those who want to live on forever in their apartment… one better– I’ll never even leave
The Cookie Monster is just living up to the name Kermit gave him
Everyone has a gift in life and mine is knowing exactly how much I can bid in a silent auction without winning
People don’t generally like instru… because music without words is just math come alive Adding words to music takes it from counting time
Civilization began when a discussion group convened to debate the meaning of the phras… The less said, the better
Mid-life crisis: the failure to start hoping you don’t get what you want