The universe is a kinetic watch so time only keeps going if we’re on the move making Zeno’s paradox of motion just a way of reassuring ourselves

I always liked making people laugh until my undergraduates told me that it was an abuse of power asym…

On Fresh Air they always mention that their rock historian lives in France as if he were in exile from rock a… the same way James Joyce wrote ab…

In showing us what darkness looks… fog is equal and opposite to stars lighting up the night sky

If we’re to believe the internet a hero’s journey consists of a hero who goes on an adventure, is victorious in a decisive crisis… and comes home changed or transfor…

My wife and I have remained happi… because she recognizes me as capta… as long as I acknowledge her as air traffic control

We mistake the feeling of control for the feeling of freedom when freedom actually consists of the courage to take risks Those who encourage us

Our bodies are exactly as strong as gravity’s resistance makes them… in recognition of mortality we symbolize this through the know… that gravity is the weakest

It feels like I’m writ– ing an unauthorized au– tobiography

There was once a time when No Jews allowed Meant No Jews allowed But now they say

I thought the Protestant work eth… I saw all the lazy rivers in peopl… until I noticed they were each swi… against the current

1. Make so much money you could he… 2. Remind yourself that “there’s n… 3. Tell yourself you need to feed… 4. Eat like kings

History’s first lesson– the ABCs– is that, unless coerced not to people kill the ones they hate History’s second lesson–

Everyone has a gift in life and mine is knowing exactly how much I can bid in a silent auction without winning

You can’t break the chain of events but you can break the chain of custody for the chain of events