Never Win Anything

If you can catch someone lying to… you can figure out what they want… If you can catch yourself lying to… you can figure out your own desire The former can make you rich

We hit it off: she’d declawed her cats and I’d plucked my cacti’s needles

An individual is someone who must… With the fact that he could be wro… And there’s no way to know for sur… But the choice must still be made The internet offers certainty

You could say I tried stand-up but for the audience it was more like when the flight attendant demonstrates how to put on your own oxygen mask…

It didn’t matter that I’d been scrupulously carbon neutral; my interlocutors persisted until I realized that the desire to make… had left a vast carbon footprint o…

Everybody talks about the lack of movies for grown-ups but no one mentions the absence of grown-ups Of course, without grown-ups

Abiding means to wait expectantly, defiantly, or submiss… and I typically manage all three in the grocery store checkout line even in the express lane

In this charming reboot of a classic kidlit gumshoe series our eponymous hero Wikipedia Brown solves thought crimes by

Those who show no compunction are the most gifted at seduction and short of a permanent injunctio… we all face induction by way of their unction

My wife and I have remained happi… because she recognizes me as capta… as long as I acknowledge her as air traffic control

After the sexual revolution men thought they could finally get what they want AND what they… while women believed they could at… get what they need AND what they…

There is only one way to claim moral authority: Convincing others that they are the authority in their own life And based on exhaustive research

We’ve taken the last ember in the ashes for a glimmer of hope

The left used to believe that the people have the power but once the Jewish people had the power to form the state of Israel