She once played a critical role in my life. We were happy together. We were cute together. We were “goals”. We were in love. Eventually our life path broke away and we lost touch. I still thought about her often and simply wanted to keep in touch but she appeared to be happy with the new found space. She had grown. Her friends were different. Her mindset had shifted. She made it clear through her words and actions that I was no longer her priority.
So I reacted accordingly.
I stopped texting her. I never checked up on her page. I had reverted back to a stranger and lost connection with a person who was once so near and dear to me. I was now becoming a new man and the memories of her importance to me began to fade. I think she recognized this change.
So she reacted accordingly.
From time to time, she would check up on me and I’d pay her little attention. Eventually she became more flirtatious and even nostalgic. I began to remember who she used to be to me. My friend. My fan. My lover. I was excited with the idea of trying again. I knew she didn’t love me, but I was content with the fact that she missed me.
But she didn’t act accordingly.
She came back to town and I assumed that id see her soon. Days passed and I had yet to see her. I texted her and the replies were slow. She never visited me. I had no plans to touch her. I had no events planned. I thought all I wanted to do was see her again. But over time, I learned that all I wanted to do was feel like a priority to her again.
My shame drowns me.
So I look at my phone full of missed calls and ignored text and I feel embarrassed. There is a woman who thinks the world of me and I closed my mind to the idea of her. There is a woman who looks out for me and for a short period I didn’t even see her. Now the girl who cried feelings disappears and the girl who has already proved herself is still there. I am ashamed because I don’t deserve her. But now I see her worth.
I will react accordingly.
She will always be first in my life now.

@Cody_swank