A wind before the calm
f I knew how to let things go
I would be a windy-wily boy
Passing the ball with the rest of them
Letting the urges drown in the well of time
But I am not of such
I have not been endowed
With talents that lead me by the head
But with the heart
Wrinkled in the sea of crushed petunias
Waiting for release upon beds of your teardrops
But as you are, I cannot fathom
How it has made my plant die and wither
Poisoned while trying to sprout
It was god-grazed
Believing in the organic properties
Of a true and clear head
Yet neglecting the open hand of friendship
Arrogance feeds the heart with sunflowers and razorblades
Grasping through the closed gate
Words fermenting in this pot
Have shown a fact
Unable to ignore
And I, with mangled veins
Shove across the kitchen floor
Bleeding from the kneecaps
Suckling at my mother’s mind
Not willing to comprehend reality
While it slaps me in the gut
Trying, or wishing of stairs
Where I can disappear among the stars
Being driven by a twinkle
To explode upon millions of atoms
And dissolve into a angel
And become a god-complex
Where I am finality
And the end-all
To be that, would be truly heaven-sanctioned
And not dripping from my wrists
Like a poor disheveled beast
Who cannot but hold his head up
And is destined to carry a tomb with him
I need a sweeter end
A one with an angel
Wings blessing upon my face
Holding the pain and keeping it out of reach
I hope that this hill will be my salvation!
