Kay

Kay


 

I can’t have another sleepless night
Staying up late
Trying to fight
Inside my brain
Its all insane
Don’t think I can take the pain
Everywhere I go
I see pain and myself
The addiction I have
Has only gotten worse
The more I do it the worse I feel
But for some reason I just can’t pull
I feel like crying
Or maybe even dying
They’d miss me to much
Would they?
Can’t even cut
The pain would still stay
I just wanna feel loved
I wanna give my love away
And not worry about being judged
How do you expect me to be ok
When I have to look the other way?
I can’t look you in the eye
Without wanting to lie
 
Everyday it’s the same thing
Wake up
Eat
Pretend
Say hi to a couple of friends
Hiding behind a mask
Its hard for me to explain
How can I?
Yes they’d understand
But I need a physical connection
Tired of being closer with strangers online
Then my own family
 
I’m tired of not being able to sleep
Tired of trying to withstand the heat
All this pressure on me
Gotta hide my entire life
From the people that surround me
Talk to my sisters
Its all the same
Tell I’m fine
When I’m going out my mind
I just don’t got the time to tell them
Don’t got the courage to say
“I keep wanting to cut. I feel the urge for a rubber band.... My heart hurts so much that I just need a hug.”
 
I NEED PHYSICAL CONTACT FROM MY SISTERS BUT I CANT GET IT!
 
I won’t lose my hope
Cuz I’ll just lose more sanity
But between you and me
 
Its a war that’s already lost to me

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