Early Feelings

Gripping my hair wishing I knew what to do.
I wasn’t quite ready for something so new.
I messed up and there nothing I can change.
Our chances just ran out of range.
I pick up the reins and keep going.
Its killing me not knowing
If she is going to be alright.
Her and I don’t have much of a fight.
So I will be put down for now.
We have taken our final bow.
I take a deep breath and think about what I need.
As I sit and pray for my Bella in a silent creed.
She will be alright because she is strong.
She has already held on for this long.
I hold myself responsible more than her.
For everything that we had occur.
I pushed and pushed her to the edge.
To the absolute end of this sharp ledge.
I ruined everything she had going for herself.
She had the benefit of the higher shelf.
And I took that from her.
And I hate myself for it.


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