comic men (part one)
Superman wasn’t as super
As Lois had us believe
He had nothing in his trousers
And a syringe up his sleeve
Yes, superman was a junkie
Dependant on smack
Lois often threw him out (But she always took him back)
Now marvel man was marvellous
As I’m sure we all agree
He often saved the world, so many times
From greed an poverty
But marvel man had a secret
Never before exposed
When he wasn’t saving the world
He dressed up in women’s clothes
Now you may think this rhyme is stupid
But I’m as serious as can be
Do you realise we were raised
Idolising the dregs of society!
Now it breaks my heart to tell you
Who is the hero on my list
But did you know that batman
Was always getting pissed
If you think about it carefully
You’ll wonder how you didn’t see
He was always leaning on poor robin
Or always going for a pee
Now batman hid his problem well
From the riddler, the joker
The penguin and the poet
Oh how lucky for the world
That they didn’t get to know it
Imagine the fate of us all
If his dastardly deeds had been discovered
But his faithful friend (and drinking partner)
Commissioner Gordon
Kept it all well and truly covered
In the records of Gotham city
To this day they still decree
That batman was a boozer
But still a hero
To
You
And
To
Me!
