Atelophobia
She pressured herself,
Set her standards too high,
She felt so inadequate,
As she watched life pass her by.
She was afraid of their judgment,
Their disapproving glance,
She could never be herself,
Because they didn’t give her a chance.
She molded herself,
Into something she was not,
And she lost herself in the process,
Lost the girl they forgot.
So she made a cover,
A mask to shield her shame,
Just another piece in the puzzle,
Of her lying game.
She put on that mask,
Of what she thought she should be,
Such a perfect girl,
But so far from reality.
She thought it was okay,
To pretend to be strong,
But the pain was intolerable,
And she learned she was wrong.
She wanted someone to come,
And take off her mask,
Because she couldn’t do it alone,
It was an impossible task.
She was what the mask wanted,
It told her its lies,
About how she wasn’t good enough,
It laughed at her cries.
The mask was her enemy,
Imperfection was her pain,
She just wanted to be perfect,
Atelophobia was her name.
So she kept a fake smile,
Plastered on her face,
Because her pain would be a burden,
Her deceits a disgrace.
She wanted you to see her face,
She wanted to be free,
But she kept the mask on,
To keep them all happy.
She remained petrified,
Unmoving in horror,
Of the thought that they’d leave her,
Alone here forever.
(2012)
