i am beginning to blur at the edge… i’ve been becoming something of lo… i think i’ve wanted this storm lon… that it will wash me away with it.

i let you watch me lose my goddamn… raging at the wallpaper and crying… i let you listen to the burning an… and the pop of a pill bottle openi… i let you feel the screaming apolo…

i’m kind of nervous you don’t love… and isn’t that hilarious? when i was so damn scared in the b… that you would love me at all.

you smell like chlorine, she tells… you smell like sunscreen, i tell h… guess we both smell like chemicals… yeah, i say, hand darting out to l…

my ma stuck that knife in me straight down to the hilt. she treated the knife like a nail, and treated her fist like a hammer… i pulled it out, bit by bit,

you hurt me so much, but i never h… i just hated you for telling me it…

insomnia, violence, puncture wound… a razor, eating your organs raw, a… impatient, obsessive, humiliating.

i’m dissecting you with a scalpel… i’m slapping you on the rack, reac… pulling out your intestines and di… doesn’t feel so good, does it?

part 1: horror i loved her, but oh my god, it was so, so bad. we were the campfire stories in th… that was us, and that’s what we st…

i flick the lighter on, on, on off. a useless fidget, one that turns my thumb gray and r…

i am the parasite and i am the hos… i’m cold and my hair is falling ou… i haven’t eaten in awhile but my t… no one knows how to pull this hung… because i am the sickness and i am…

i want you to know that i love you… and that thinking too much about i… to be completely honest, just for… i don’t know the normal amount of… i’m afraid sometimes that i don’t…

“do you still think i’m pretty?” i… mascara running down my face, lips…

i don’t want to think about you an… so please, stop asking about me. stop telling my friends you’re sor… for the hopes it will get through… i don’t miss you anymore.

i miss being a kid when the saddes…