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Chris Gaither

Happy Wife, Happy Life

Honor Your Wife and the World Won’t Be Able to Keep You in Check

Male materialists
rarely make for marriage material
because in their insistence that
life’s not fair
they further insist
that marriage must be 50/50
when in reality
marriage is more like chess
in which the king is nominally at the top
(setting him up as the one to be toppled)
and the queen has all the moves

Autres oeuvres par Chris Gaither...
The Reward for Good Work Is More Work Unless You Prefer Paperwork

In this earthly abode ‘Twas sadness that flowed With each new download Of binary code To ease our workload
These Boots Were Made For Gawking

I was never comfortable in my own skin but I always felt okay in alligator boots
Haiku

The closest I ev– er came to forming Voltron was using Groupon
 1
In First-person Shooters You Don’t Have a Body, Just a Gun

A mind without a body, Say one that’s been uploaded to th… Is like a thought without words– You can picture it But it’s senseless
The Rise of the Real Isn’t a True Story but Is Real Nonetheless

Where once the Imaginary, the Sym… formed three sides of the same coi… now there is but one side to every… as the Imaginary is displaced by t… the Symbolic is scrambled in servi…
The Human Rain Delay

We treat life as if Postponing the inevitable When we should be busy Preparing for the inestimable
“Researchers at the University of Texas at Austin reported they successfully used a brain scanner paired with an AI language model to glean the gist of a person’s thoughts and translate them into words”

When anything you think Can and will be used against you The purpose of state-funded educat… Will be learning not to think As the doyens of higher learning
Fly, Turkeys, Fly

Thanks to his bifocals Ben Franklin could see that while we might look like bald… up close we’re clearly turkeys
My One and Only You

Every night when Smokey Bear would tuck me in… the last thing he always said was Only you can prevent forest fires
I Wore #42 in Basketball Because My Life Is 42% Gold

Thinking that the purpose of life… things looked good enough on the s… to believe that my life was 24-karat gold Who knew that the purpose of beaut…
Choose Your Own Leviathan While You Still Can

For now American democracy such as it is is still getting the people it deserves
Man Does Not Live on Oodles of Noodles Alone, but Woe Is He Who Also Lives on Oodles of Flapdoodles

Domination is feudal But resistance seems futile And lo, we canoodle With the large standard poodle We all know as boodle
The Before, the After, and the Beautiful

Let’s call the before times “The… It’s not what you know It’s who you know But after the social media It’s not who you know
Eye of the Liger

Looking back on college it’s unclear if I was a party animal party mineral or party vegetable
Define Late Capitalism

It’s when all the signs say Everything must go



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