Language is great for Letting us tell each other Where it hurts And you keep telling me It hurts when I don’t listen

In the world to come The United Nations will finally r… If you can’t beat ‘em Join ‘em

You can’t watch sports these days… Father Time is undefeated Which is when I always quote Saul… “Vait a minute. Vat about Rocky…

The only way to become friends And stay friends Is to spend time together Is it any wonder, then That pandemic lockdowns

The jig is finally up When Mr. Cool Goes to shul

Actual justice consists of hearing both sides of the story in order to decide which side is in the right meaning that justice

God took the risk and made human beings to add meaning to His creation God gambled everything because this could mean anything

I was voluntold to make myself sca… But scarcely do they realize In pretending to give me a choice They have unwittingly given me an… Truth or dare?

All words are defined by other words except for God’s rule

Jews will tell you Right up front That they believe They are the chosen people WASPs believe that they believe

The number one cause of divorce Is holding a grudge We are divorced from reality Because we hold a grudge against t… We resent the truth

Saying Get out of your comfort zone to an American is like telling a turtle to get out of its shell

For now American democracy such as it is is still getting the people it deserves

We like to think That the solution to our problems Is coming together As one human family When this whole time