People will only tell the truth when they think they can get away with it For example, perjury laws only wor… by publicly threatening jail time
All cars have always been getaway cars because they tell the world how much you’re getting away with but now all cars are SUVs
If dreams are the fulfillment of wishes you aren’t allowed to make then daydreams are the fulfillment of wishes
After you’ve uploaded everything t… and run the lot of it through the… be sure to recycle, but keep a lit… perhaps in a locket around your ne… or, if you go in for irony,
Keep in mind that if you’re going to jump from the frying pan into the fire a golden parachute just buys you plenty of time to ponder
When I put a period at the end of my text message it means that
The easiest way to tell that climate change is a new religion is that it allows for plenty of missed deadlines
The best way to control somebody Is to divide the mind from the bod… Because the body is where the soul…
Much like nuclear weapons the whole point of having vacation days is never to use them
This is the stage in history where we all give constructive cri… to the demolition crew
In the official version of my life I love my life In real life I love life itself
Strange that we use Out of order for broken and for breaking the rules As if the Coke machine
If as according to us their problem is being worse than… at least they can get better But our problem
Just when you think You’ve seen it all It all falls apart So, you put it back together again Thinking this time it’s forever
The cover-up is always worse when there’s no crime