I Envy Your Disguise
I know I shouldn’t be here
you tell me that I’m wrong
since you made me what I’m not
I know I don’t belong
My friends can only stare at me
they don’t know what to say
they speak to you and look at me
then turn and walk away
you tell me that I’m seeing things
that isn’t what was done
while laughter dances in your eyes
my agony your fun
you think that I deserve this
for standing on my feet
I should have let you run away
isn’t vengeance sweet
you’ve turned and twisted who I am
I see it in their eyes
you’ve made yourself the better
I envy your disguise
(2004)
written during what was, to date, the darkest time in my life. I was forced to accept that people, regardless of their intelligence or awareness, can be such cowards in life. I am not sure how some people even live with themselves. But I now know that everything is a stepping stone toward a better life
