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Woops, Your Ladyship

All’s quiet at the dinner table tonight
Until your ladyship let loose a blast.
“Where did that foul smell come from?
Which one of you did it?”
Asked the butler to the chambermaids.
“We know nothing of that sort,” said they.
“We are ladies, and we don’t
Do that sort of thing.
Maybe it was Lord Shnickerbottom.
He and our Prime Minister have always
Been at odds with each other.
“Did you have an accident in your pants,
Lord Shnickerbottom that caused
That dreadful odor?” “Not I, Sir.
Maybe it was that disgusting dog.
I saw the way it was wagging its tail.”
You bad, bad dog.”
Replied Lady Windermere, the culprit,
To Mr. Shnoggems, the butler.
“Take that bad dog outside
And give him a royal spanking.”
 
The moral of the story:
Dogs of royalty don’t have and easy life.
The higher up in class their masters are,
The more they get blamed
For something they didn’t do.
Dogs of the lower classes
Have it made.
Their masters let loose a blast all the time,
And they don’t get blamed
For anything.

Other works by Robert L. Martin...



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