Bloody Footprints and a Staircase to Success
To my father
Look at me, not my scars
Look me in the eye, and you’ll see the stars
I see the world, the beauty and the unclean
I hear the music, and see the unseen
Look at my face, not the blood on the floor
Watch me leave bloody footprints as I walk out the door
Yes, I have indeed left
You will never see my face again until we meet in death
And with every step, I keep climbing the stairs
Hoping to sleep with the stars and hoping you’ll take me there
But you won’t, the only thing I have is me
Repeating and repeating the screams of the free
Stop
Take a look at yourself
Am I the one you need to judge or are you the one that needs help
I’ve learned to stand, on my own two feet
Climbing a staircase that keeps going that I’ll never defeat
And what’s the point, you ask me as though I care
Its something out of you’re comfort zone and all you do is stare
You watch me run, you watch me fight
You watch me almost end my own life
You watch me sing, and you watch me soar
You watch as I leave, your face meeting the door
I’m ready, to keeping climbing to heights
You’ve never even dreamed of and I’ll watch the brightest of lights
Light up the world, with an infamous glow
I’ll watch the beauty of it all and rhyme it in a flow
My life could be fast, it could be numb
One more step and I could be done
I could give in
I could give my pain away and suffer within
I could stop, the words on the page
A letter to you of what I became
But I won’t
I want you to see
This who I am and who I’m gonna be
Fuck your rights, and fuck your wrongs
I’m not giving in I’ll be strong
You may not love me, you may despise
But why would you hate someone who actually tries
I try to be good, I try my best
But you take all of that away and leave me with nothing left
So watch as I leave, it’s what I must do
There was never any chance of me getting through to you
Watch as I take, this very first step
Slamming the door closed
You are all alone
You’re all that you’ll have left.
(2012)
This is an old poem I wrote for my father, though as of now we have made it past all of the things I was trying to discuss through this poem.
