When I fall asleep-
I tell myself sweet lies, half truths.
Paint mirages of trippy fluorecent skies.
A hint of reality, to sound grounded..
My delusional scenarios too are–
Adamantly drafted to remain reliable.
The meticulous lies it paints–
Oh the dear monster in my head.
Creepily laughing, eerily observing
Hanging head down from the corner of the ceiling.
Love, careful. He’s got an an eye on you too.
The hours i spent idle under layers of beddings
Under dim lit ceilings, that never meet my eyes
My dead open eyes, stare straight back
They reflect straight into my mind
The painstaking reckoning of innumerable possibilities
Scrutinizing every minute plausibility -
Them dreamt of 'what if’s– and impossibilities
That break through my walls of beliefs
Onto the other side with my curiosities.
You know, where you & I exist.
In our fantasies, that little house by the sea.
I hide in my spot, its somewhere in that house.
I sit and glare at the water, try to rhyme with the sea.
Until i drown in that sea, float into the abyss..
It takes me to this chasm, pitch black.
I float endlessly, and then i fool myself again–
For i believe when my eyes close finally,
This soul would transitions onto its own journey..
Treading through my thoughts,
I feel it tries to meet the monster at the shore–
On neutral turfs this time, levelled grounds.
It goes against my thematic scheme,
The two of them seem eerily amiable...
They play hide and seek, and bet on me!
Take control, make dares and plant goofy snares!
Fake personalities, and implant idyllic fantasies..
They make the most up for me, when i finally fall asleep.
