Mid-life is when you realize you’re in a clown car The end of life is about accepting that of all the clowns

Instead of the invisible hand bending self-interest towards the collective good we got the risible glad-hand laughing our selfishness off

The baton is a scroll that says– among other things– The road goes on forever Heaven is

I wear black socks On the outside Because black is how I feel In the onside

God is equal parts Ardor and candor But we can’t get a handle on True love

In this world The greatest pleasure Is always anticipation: Moshiach is coming!

When people give you the silent treatment have them put it in writing

The buzz you’re suddenly hearing Is the dawning recognition That buzzwords aren’t magic after… And that the real magic words Aren’t just older than time

A man wants the mother of his children to be a chef in the kitchen “imaginative” in the bedroom a shrink in the living room

At this late juncture All eating is competitive eating But in the world to come All competition will be An excuse for a feast

They used to give me Birthday presents Now they give me A wide berth

A planning committee’s second most… Is coming up with a plan That everyone can agree to But no one is happy with This sounds strange until you real…

Business or pleasure? Let’s get down to business and ple… This is also known as Dying happy

I hope to live several decades more making it odd to know so very well what they’ll put

You would think doing well on social media would give you strength in numbers but you only end up