Once I realized that I wasn’t afraid of sky diving just that my parachute wouldn’t op… I was able to conquer my fear without ever leaving the ground

The fox is in both henhouses– Yours and your neighbor’s– Because the roosters standing guar… Have turned on one another Plucking each other’s eyes out

Frequently, God’s light is like sun glare, telling me to slow the heck down

The cogito may be airtight but its reverse– I am, therefore I think– is less certain

I like positive reinforcement As much as the next guy And the next guy Gets a lot of likes So, it’s back to the grindstone

It should come as no surprise when the Emperor with no clothes e… Off with their threads!

He was the kind of husband who when his wife asked him to stop sa… complied but started looking for excuses to… panda bear

Antizionism feels powerful Because it claims the authority Of giving permission to hate But the feeling is soon vanquished Requiring another hit of hate

In all my years as warden I could never figure out how to co… with NFPA code 14.14.1.5.1- “Access to exits shall be marked b… readily visible signs in all cases…

God: Do you trust me? Me: It’s not my fault!

In 2019 KLM Airlines began advertising that you should take the train instead; it felt like being asked to open up the marriage

The surest sign That people don’t know what they w… Is when they want to have it both… But since you can’t have it both w… They settle for enforcing one way

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (C… Holds that there is a sequence In which an experience is followed… By a belief, a thought, and a feel… Fair enough

A dissident today is anyone who realizes that since you’re damned if you do damned if you don’t

You know a hipster is aging gracef… When he comes to see that Objects in mirror Are closer than they appear