Much like nuclear weapons the whole point of having vacation days is never to use them

Philosophers dream of “The view from nowhere” Granting pure objectivity Instead, we got the internet’s View from everywhere

Looking back on college it’s unclear if I was a party animal party mineral or party vegetable

Nation-states are for the embodied Bodies are for souls Souls need everything in moderatio… Cyberspace is for cyborgs Cyborgs are for real

There was once a time when No Jews allowed Meant No Jews allowed But now they say

In the new version of Heads I win, tails you lose People hate to be wrong But love to apologize And if you accept their apology

No shoes, no shirt, no service Just say no Do not pass go, do not collect $20… Don’t call us, we’ll call you No pain, no gain

In five big boardrooms on Earth There soon came to be a great mirt… At the growth in net worth That fed on a dearth In all of the people’s self-worth

Human beings are social creatures because even though we can only ever talk to ourselves it works better when we talk to ou… in the presence of others

Less self-interest is in your best interest except on Pinterest

From where I was situated There was no room to maneuver In the situation room And everybody else found themselve… In the same situation

One year Has seven dog years And one of God’s weeks Has seven days Accordingly

You can’t put a square peg in a round hole but you can put a JPEG in a memory hole

Desperate to identify new funding… We gambled that a steady stream of… Would flow to those whose stream o… Forebode the worst downstream effe… So, we began livestreaming the fut…

Inevitably my spirit vegetable was rutabaga