For now American democracy such as it is is still getting the people it deserves

The Cookie Monster is just living up to the name Kermit gave him

God knows that the only thing you can give the man who has everything is another chance

I want to believe in God I believe in UFOs I don’t believe in recycling I don’t want to believe in what th…

Under new management, hell now consists of friendly fire

At judgment day they put the brief in debriefing by getting right to the point: You could have made a difference– Did you?

As bumbling first mate to his capt… Gilligan wasn’t in charge But he was the star of the show Which is how the male ego understa…

We went from wearing galoshes over… to wearing galoshes over our shoes… to wearing galoshes as shoes and now we wear galoshes over galo…

Life used to be hard And that’s how we liked it So much that we used to say Hurry up and wait In the understanding that

The most useful pawn is the one who believes himself king

A charmed half-life is the time taken to lower your expectations to half their original value

Obscene Is an institution with a 50.7 bill… Coveting an additional 686 million… To cover two-thirds of its researc… Because the truth is

Never get greedy Always cut your losses And remember that it’s better to be lucky than good and it’s bad luck to be so good th…

Don’t fear death– Time is the chisel With which we sculpt the infinite Or if, like me, you work with word… Each day is a first edition

There was once a time when No Jews allowed Meant No Jews allowed But now they say