We’ve gone from individuals distinguishing themselves from the… begging to differ– “Whatever it is, I’m against it”- to groups

In contemporary materialism the miracle of consciousness is filtered through zeros and ones making One a number of things with zero chance of going right

You could say I tried stand-up but for the audience it was more like when the flight attendant demonstrates how to put on your own oxygen mask…

I’ll never forget when a guy standing in his front yard confronted me about looking into parked car windows mistaking me for a car thief

Much of life is boring Which is also why Life is so funny

When we imagine the future, we say One day Because One day is the name of a day As in New Year’s Day

Of course, the west Still thinks it’s the best And in the postmodern west The best is the worst Which is all well and good

God’s abundance Enables the agency of knowing when… While the devil’s overabundance Leaves you unprepared to exercise… To wit

Faced with a forced choice The agnostic feigns ignorance For if you ask a woman to marry yo… And she says I don’t know

What do you call it when people are so bored that they start playing with fire and soon enough find themselves fighting fire with fire

You’ll know it’s the Fountain of… when you dive in to get it over wi… endure the shock, but then you never get used to it

My wife sleeps on her back while I sleep in the mis– take prone position

She was so cool that even her periods were fashionably late

The first half of life: Did I say that? The second half of life: I did say that The end of life:

I have a tendency to overreact When people tell me to get lost By taking them literally and serio… Which is literally how I found Go… Seriously!