No one is exactly sure why God switched from a pass/fail syst… to having you grade yourself but there have been quite a lot of B-plusses flying ar…
Post-pandemic life is like being a… Who comes home only to find Her parents have replaced Her obviously dead goldfish With a new one
My dreams are no longer about wish fulfillment but about the Amazon fulfillment center
The only reason to pursue fame is to forestall the possibility that you’re the kind of person who would die wishing you’d been more famous
The discomfort that Americans now all evince in one another used to be reserved for old people who get rich quick
They put a circle at dead ends so you can either live there or turn back but we just keep
Because it’s so hellacious transmuting lead into gold the people pleaser finds it heavenly to degrade gold into lead
I told my daughter Let me give you some free advice: You get what you pay for And she said I don’t get it
It’s become harder than ever to be the court jester– you have to use humor to speak
A mind without a body, Say one that’s been uploaded to th… Is like a thought without words– You can picture it But it’s senseless
You can only e– ver explain things with that which cannot be explained
Afraid that everything I wanted was nothing to write home about I was left with nothing to write home about
I can’t say I have wants and needs; mainly I don’t want to be needy
The universe is a kinetic watch so time only keeps going if we’re on the move making Zeno’s paradox of motion just a way of reassuring ourselves
Instead of the invisible hand bending self-interest towards the collective good we got the risible glad-hand laughing our selfishness off
