The original version’s working title was The Giveth and Taketh Away Tree but Silverstein couldn’t get it published
Because, per Morrissey “We hate it when our friends becom… we got rid of success by eliminating all competition except for the number of friends
Hook-up apps have given intimacy all the allure of an oil change
In the story of The boy who cried wolf There was no wolf Until there was And there still is
The difference between poisonous snakes and venomous human beings is that when the snake bites you and explains
It’s all over but for the shouting and this is the shouting
When I got my first honey-do list after the wedding I explained to my bride that I us… until I was bitten by one of the 5… that don’t make webs
It was only after we debuted our sugar coated raisins to fight back against Craisins that I realized you could win hearts and minds
You’ll know it’s the Fountain of… when you dive in to get it over wi… endure the shock, but then you never get used to it
Mating For Life Saved My
We went from wearing galoshes over… to wearing galoshes over our shoes… to wearing galoshes as shoes and now we wear galoshes over galo…
A movement can only cohere around a shared wish and the left sticks together by collectively wishing that Jews deserve what they get
By Jove, the easi– est way to work on yourself is to get married
All words are defined by other words except for God’s rule
If you leave well enough alone for long enough you’ll have enough to make you cry