Friendly competition is heaven on… Culture war is hell on wheels Of time But now that our culture’s wheels… We’ll soon be out of time

If you want to remain married one partner should stay busy moving the goalposts while the other focuses on running out the clock

Unlike echolocation language doesn’t bounce off an obj… Instead language encounters the world and… allowing you to get lost

In our western culture you shan’t take pride in the power you’ve cultivated over the Other so you have to convince yourself

Both my parents were tall and I ended up a shrimp Not coincidentally, my diet has al… largely consisted of pink flamingo… though scientists insist that it’s…

It used to be that if you were obscure you had to be able to handle the truth and if you were famous

We have achieved the classless society: eve– rything is tacky

The number one rule For doing a number on us Is taking a number Because when our number comes up It’s only ever because our days ar…

My fellow Americans Where once we shared a collective… We called the will of the people That simultaneously tamed and expr… We have now regressed to the preci…

When God closes one store He opens another

You know you must die and yet you must live You can never know if you’re right and yet you must choose So it’s not

My house built in the 1920s still has a TV antenna like a tattoo you got in early mid… with which you’ve come to have

My wife is a lot like God If God weren’t perfect Like Him, she’s my toughest criti… But also my fiercest champion

Before I met you the happiest I’d ever been was when everything I’d ever wante… was on lay-away because I didn’t have to make any…

When life gives white people lemon… they make ginger tea lemonade wit…