One would think the earth is flat “Unless” as the Coen brothers put it “round is funny”
Notice how the giraffe evolved so that its neck is precisely long… to reach the water when it bends d…
You can cash in on your talent You can cash in on your good looks You can cash in on your hard work You can cash in on your good luck You can even cash in on all four
None of us can see further than our own noses but Pinocchio can see further than the rest of us
Life is a talent show where most everyone is doing bad versions of easy impressions
I grew up listening to Barbara St… You don’t bring me flowers anymore and determined I’d never make that… Ten years into marriage my wife sa… Don’t bring me flowers anymore
We’ll never win a power struggle But that’s never stopped us trying And we always end up tying Because our fates are tied togethe…
He was a Murphy’s law and order R… Everyone who can be locked up will be locked up
In a Hegelian reversal, I couldn’t com– plain but it would help
Woe betide the man who accepts an apology
When we say something is infinite Say, the universe What we really mean Is that it is unfinished
When they drew a winner It looked like we’d won By the luck of the draw But we came by our good fortune The honest way:
Even when religion is about the symbolic it must guard against fundamentalism But when religion
When I was a kid the rule was one kid got to pour two glasses of Coke and the other kid
It feels like I’m writ– ing an unauthorized au– tobiography
