The difference between Mother Nature and God the Father is that the former doesn’t suffer fools gladly while the latter

Don’t talk to strangers; Sing with them

Funny how as the left lost its sense of humor it became a joke

If husbands were like pro basketball players I’d be an all star but one with an exceptionally low trade value

Can’t buy me love but you can buy me likes

People thought they could finally come and go as they pleased if they could just be rid of the g… only to find in their absence not just more and bigger gates

If you travel through time it’s always the best of times and the worst of times; it’s just the ratio

You’ve met your femme fa– tale when you can’t stop wishful thinking about her

In communist Russia no one wanted to be seen to be the first person to stop clapping for Stalin In America today

All behavior is purposeful and all behavior is self-serving until you realize that all behavior is self-serving which is when you find out what ha…

What if I could just do no wrong Then surely, I’d still get to bel… Perforce, I did nothing And found myself bluffing Whenever I needed to be strong

Nero fiddles while Rome burns? Fiddle-de-dee! Nero riddles but Rome never learn…

There’s always a deadline when I read a lifeline so I’ll cut right to the chase: Conjoined with your avatar you will live forever

Aristocracy failed because it couldn’t keep some of the people happy all of the time Democracy is failing because

God said satis– faction guaranteed; religion is all the fine print