Life = Trial by fire Death = Trial by firing squad

You can’t know what you will decid… But you will know when you have de… You can’t know how you will act on… But you already know what is at st… Everything hangs in the balance;

You must go on. I can’t go on. I’ll ramble on.

I can never remember street names navigating strictly by landmarks taking left turns just past abandoned doughnut shops impugning me to keep my marriage

You’ll never convince me that when the sun and moon are out at the same time it isn’t the sun appearing at nigh…

Carry a pen, should you need to write “Note to self: Congratulations!”

A boundary is a line until you cross it when it becomes a binding leaving you all tied up with nowhere to go

The turning point came after I pegged my happi– ness to the dollar

I thought my alarm clock woke me up each day but the day I realized it had always been a false alarm was the day I realized

When I picked candy apples as my… (think spirit animals for foodies) I honestly had no idea I was naturally sweet but laid it on way too thick

Of late, being good materialists we put space first calling this universe spacetime Yet, at the speed of light it’s not space collapsing

In the first half of life I tried it your way and succeeded which is how I got over you In the second half of life I did it my way and failed

Whoever said It’s lonely at the top must have never had their own spelling group in third grade

We live in an age when the greatest danger is an excess of caution

You can’t watch sports these days… Father Time is undefeated Which is when I always quote Saul… “Vait a minute. Vat about Rocky…