God’s command to cells was slightly different: be fruitful and divide

Once again, we find ourselves unable to avoid asking– Why do so many people hate Jews to the point of wanting to see the… But let’s refine the question,

A planning committee’s second most… Is coming up with a plan That everyone can agree to But no one is happy with This sounds strange until you real…

You’ll know whether you’re there to make things better or to make yourself feel better by how you react when you’re told you can do better

Now that everyone else is also holier than thou Our far left raised the stakes becoming holier than Mao With slogans of piffle

I’ve started blind copying my wife on emails to myself

All forms of life have an unconsci… sentient animals have developed co… to extend the unconscious’ operati… and human beings have developed la… to make consciousness the unconsci…

The only reason to pursue fame is to forestall the possibility that you’re the kind of person who would die wishing you’d been more famous

It turns out they were right when they removed the self-destruc… explaining You won’t be needing this anymore now that you have autocorrect

The quartermaster is responsible f… and nothing more Some of you will be content to half-ass the rest of it Some of you will be willing to ris…

Right up until the last revision it said Life, liberty and the hot pursuit…

For twenty years people kept insis… that there was an elephant in the… but I just didn’t see it And then I realized I was the elephant

Just as birds regurgitate to feed their young human beings have culture

I was happily feeding at the trough when I noticed it had been filled with finger food

It’s become harder than ever to be the court jester– you have to use humor to speak