They couldn’t have been more obvio… in their preparations for the surp… trusting that I was the type loathe to ruin my own surprise

My ego is too big

In communist Russia no one wanted to be seen to be the first person to stop clapping for Stalin In America today

When I sallied forth to share my… just one voice in the wild multipl… They told me to go fly a kite; it seemed that’s just life in the… Then I recalled as it began to ta…

Step up to bat– It’s you against the world First base– Doubt yourself Second base–

If I could change one thing about… I would stop trying to make myself Impervious to change

I always like to know where I stand and I always bring an umbrella that can double

It would have been enough Had God merely kept His promises But since He knows a thing or two About human psychology God always under-promises and over…

While I was waiting for them to come to their senses they came to my house

When I got my first honey-do list after the wedding I explained to my bride that I us… until I was bitten by one of the 5… that don’t make webs

I am simultaneously purging while binge watching TV on my Gal… by ignoring my wife and kids

People think that their report car… will be graded Pass/Fail but since God has a mysterious rep… He gives two grades in every subje… You get an A for effort

Like Jacob If you wrestle with the divine Through the darkest hours You will get hurt and limp away Which we call experiencing loss

They used to give me Birthday presents Now they give me A wide berth

Cartoonists always draw the lightb… pointing up so that no one will think it’s a n…