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I Need You

You’re always on my mind,
Whether I’m with you or without you,
No contact for months on end,
Yet I’ll still think about you.
My scars still bleed from when you cut me with your knife,
Yet still I make up reasons why I need you in my life.
 
You keep me up at night, yet without you I can’t sleep,
You make me lose my appetite, yet without you I can’t eat,
Even though you’re smaller, I’m forever at your feet,
My love for you is secret so we have to be discreet.
I have to pick you up from an anonymous address,
‘Cus if you’re seen at my doorstep then I’ll have to confess,
We can’t tell people about us, they won’t understand,
They’ll only see the bad in you, blind to your helping hand.
 
You give me confidence I never knew I had before,
You hide away my problems so they bother me no more,
You elevate my mood so that I’m happy all the time,
You seek out all the good and show it to me, oh how kind.
 
Yet the longer I know you, the more of you I need,
What started as friendship has turned into greed?
It costs money to see you; it used to be free,
Until my doctor said you’re not good for me.
But what the hell does he know? Mr PHD,
Thinks he knows it all because he has a big degree.
Forget prescriptions, let’s leave those behind,
Tramadol dear, I’ll find you online!
 
About seven months and a thousand pounds later,
You still play a part in my daily equator,
No feelings of high though, our relationship’s formal,
I take you now so that I can feel normal.
Perhaps one day we’ll part, but for now I still need you,
Until that day comes, I’ll just lay here beneath you.
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