I need the guy who trains your mind so that you can walk barefoot across hot coals to come to my house

Once again, we find ourselves unable to avoid asking– Why do so many people hate Jews to the point of wanting to see the… But let’s refine the question,

You can’t take both forks in the road but you can overpack

My wife now relates to me very much as she does to stinky cheese

Most people can get away with sweeping a few things under the ru… but when I started working at the… I couldn’t help noticing how the rugs looked like

I was one of the ones who craved religion without religion This, apparently was easy to arrange But now that I’m longing for

For twenty years people kept insis… that there was an elephant in the… but I just didn’t see it And then I realized I was the elephant

I fist met Cap’n Crunch back when he was 2nd Lieutenant C… He did this weird thing where he’d… in the powdered milk powder and sa… Stays crunchy even in milk!

Only a fool believes that the river obeys the riverbed

You can’t watch sports these days… Father Time is undefeated Which is when I always quote Saul… “Vait a minute. Vat about Rocky…

The struggle to become an individual in no way implies the need to be unique

You’ll know you’re but a prop In someone else’s mise en scene When, after the photo op And the choir’s said amen You’re left to close up shop

If I’ve learned one thing from Pa… it’s that until I believe in God I will be enslaved to others That would have been enough! But I also learned that

What do you call a wolf in sheep’s clothing who believes you are what you wear? The ruling class

The one thing postmodernists know… is that the surest way to control… is to convince people there are no… prompting an endless chain of seco… while provoking so much anxiety