God: Do you trust me? Me: It’s not my fault!

We hit it off: she’d declawed her cats and I’d plucked my cacti’s needles

When I was a kid the rule was one kid got to pour two glasses of Coke and the other kid

Physicists insist that time can flow both forward and backward So, I always insist on sitting in the backward facing seats of th… because I need to be able to see

You bet your bottom dollar I’ll bet the bottom of my heart

Afraid that everything I wanted was nothing to write home about I was left with nothing to write home about

I have a prediction to make: We can’t predict the ending But when it’s all said and done Everything will seem obvious For example,

Nature codes us for the road Man decodes and lo, a crossroads Where God goads

When you have to share everything else you can still hog the blame pie

Art is where the Symbolic meets the Real forming a liminal space between meaning and its absence AI-generated art is where the Unr…

My dreams are no longer about wish fulfillment but about the Amazon fulfillment center

Relationships are hard work unless you’ve preemptively announc… that you’re quitting but staying on as a volunteer

In all my years as warden I could never figure out how to co… with NFPA code 14.14.1.5.1- “Access to exits shall be marked b… readily visible signs in all cases…

If people tell you what they plan to do and you don’t believe them it’s because pretending they don’t really mean it

God isn’t dead which is another way of saying God isn’t unemployed and still has the same job just with a new job description