Steely Dan sings “I don’t wanna do your dirty work… again and again only once intoning “I foresee terrible trouble
The older that I get, the more wanton lust looks like wanting for love
We have achieved the classless society: eve– rything is tacky
My wife is philosophically opposed to my habit of justifying things, say a bag of the really good kind… with the phrase: I deserve it
As a child Whenever I played Ms. Pac Man On my Atari 2600 I dialed the settings down From four ghosts to one
My dad was a very religious man He always told me You’ve made your bed now you’ve got to not eat in it
Miss Suzie had a scapegoat The scapegoat was Hillel Miss Suzie went to heaven The scapegoat went to Hello terminator
Early big bang theor– ists were known for eating quite a lot of popcorn
Decisions my wife doesn’t make are settled by stare decisis
When I was a baby My mother wiped my bum Social media, then, is the fountai… As I become its obedient child Every time it wipes my memory
You both cause and cure real self-… by performing fake self-loathing for an online audience The cure takes when you’ve no authentic self left
Peace is not the goal It is the byproduct of the goal The goal is obvious Which is why we can’t see it
7 in 10 Americans believe in heave… while only 6 in 10 believe in hell which is why the house always wins
Our central moral sentiment– that doing the right thing is its… hasn’t done us much good because through it we live in deni… that in this world
If my wife could re-draft she says she’d still take me but only after trading back to the second round
