When I said That’s none of your business they replied Actually, that’s our entire busine…
America’s belief system– The show must go on– comes into focus when you suspend disbelief Because it’s not about justice
The difference between Being asleep at the wheel And being asleep at the wheel Of a self-driving car Is that in the former
In the past walking into a cathedral made you feel small Now it makes you feel fat
Jews have learned the hard way How to discern when someone has Failed to earn their F for failin… The tell is whenever a Jew just Living a life
We believe that God is being because it’s our only way to access God as meaning
You can’t call timeout in soccer But you can fake an injury You can’t call timeout in life But you can fake yourself out By believing you’ve faked us all o…
Money is our failed attempt To materialize trust Making true wealth An unshakable trust
Heads I bite my tongue Tails You cut it off
It’s not a real collection Unless It’s unsatisfying It’s not real money Until
It never snows anymore in Baltimore but it did before you left open the refrigerator doo…
We never know what’s in the offing Which is why we’re always on Except on Shabbos When we’re off And then it’s off to the races aga…
When people ask me How are you doing? I tell them That’s above my pay grade
If you want to remain married one partner should stay busy moving the goalposts while the other focuses on running out the clock
You can spend your life trying to understand why bad things happen to good people only to learn that good people do bad things
