Beauty is in the eye of the stockholder

I was born in the summer of my 47th year coming home to a place my mazel’d ever been before

Upon dying peacefully in my sleep surrounded by family after a long, prosperous life the Grim Reaper looked at me and… I’m glad to see you’ve arrived saf…

This is the stage in history where we all give constructive cri… to the demolition crew

I can never remember street names navigating strictly by landmarks taking left turns just past abandoned doughnut shops impugning me to keep my marriage

Peanut butter’s not very good by itself but chocolate is Because I’m not very religious it’s important for me

The US Constitution rules out cruel and unusual punishment but that and a nickel will get you 1% of a cup of coffee now that cruelty is the usual

I’m not scared of the explicit danger I’m afraid of the implicit threats

The baton is a scroll that says– among other things– The road goes on forever Heaven is

Faith can only move mountains by ignoring mountains of evidence Like most people who’ve lost their… I’ve retained my ability to ignore mountains of evidence

I used to have my own opinions then I started sharing them

A man without an enemy is like a vampire with a reflection

I’m converting to Judaism but I’m a Scorpio so, I have a head start

When at last my colleagues convinced me to go out after work and I’d relaxed enough to drop my… everyone could finally see my helm…

Decisions my wife doesn’t make are settled by stare decisis